On Civility

Cover of The Harbinger, Fall 2018 edition

Note from Editor: The following article is featured in our upcoming print edition of The Harbinger. Be on the lookout and grab a copy at the campuses of Illinois Central College later this week!

11/26/18 – East Peoria, IL

It’s everywhere; and it sells:

Protests and allegations of paid protesters, Antifa, Southern Poverty Law Center,  “Rules for Radicals,” the infamous “Elevator Confrontation,” heckling in restaurants, wannabe marching immigrant invasions (as opposed to would-be immigrants), flaring tempers, candidates and campaigns and calls for contributions…

We gobble it up.  It catches the headlines, it hits the front covers of magazines, it grabs our passing attention on The Almost-Big Screen, and it colors our increasingly expanding election campaigns.

But is “it” a right, a privilege, an intrusion, mere rudeness, or useful? Is it evolving human consciousness and social behavior, or an alternative to all-out rioting and wars?

Yes… All of the above, when viewing all and every persuasion. (But who is it useful to, and for what purposes, and are those purposes ever legitimate?) We love it or we hate it, we are fascinated or revolted by it, we debate where to set limits on “it.” But it’s here. It’s a very present part of our lives.  And it sells… and sells…and sells…

So, what is “it?” In a nutshell, it is adult bullying, aggression, and manipulation.

Some might say that bullying, aggression, and manipulation will only stop when we either stand up on our hind legs and demand it to stop, take action to force it to stop, or find another ally or allies who will demand, distract, threaten, or counter-aggress on our behalf—same as the childhood playground bully who demands lunch money. Same as international relations, warfare, or threats of warfare.

This semester, October 31st was celebrated as an excuse for celebrating all that is Almost-Evil; but it is also the anniversary of The Protestant Reformation, which in turn was an artifact of the Gutenberg printing press. As a culture that is increasingly split at the same time it is increasingly unified, we value our differences of opinion and our personal needs to express those opinions—often at the expense, loss, discomfort, inconvenience, and even sometimes the injury of others.  So, where do we set limits? Where does it end?

Are confrontations that impinge on the rights of others really only “free speech?” And is the definition itself political and one-sided? Seriously, the definitions already exist in local, state, and federal laws. It’s the media coverage of the events and the enforcement of those laws that are currently subject to such a large wobble-factor.  It turns out that this enforcement and coverage, in turn, are motivated and manipulated by the forces of economics and social psychology. Even when we already know right from wrong, it becomes a matter of what we can get away with. Humans are imperfect beings—our internal consciences need a little outside help in the form of a healthy fear of consequences, even as adults… or wannabe “adults.”  That would include peer-outcome for bad behavior.

Or more importantly, we need to perceive greater reward for reinforcing doing what we already know is right than getting by with what we already know is wrong.  Reward, social scientists tell us, is more powerful than punishment or fear of punishment.

The challenge, then— How can we as social humans, at this time and place, make it more rewarding to not hurt other people, to be “civil,” than to aggress and bully and manipulate for our own individual or collective advantage, whether under the guise of pursuing our own “rights” or otherwise?

Hey, that ain’t going to be any fun…

And there’s the rub— That’s exactly the problem. If we’re getting our jollies from the power trips of dominating, torturing, generally hurting or exploiting others “because we can,” or from getting peer admiration and entertainment from doing so, we’re not exactly going to be shamed into changing our behavior. On that base a level, we need to begin to master the art of shifting the payoffs. That in itself can be a big subject, but we need to make it our new buzzword and focus.

By Peg Pendell

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